I have a message I saved that was written to me over a year ago by someone. I think it can apply to many of us, give it a read:
Quote:
When you grow up, your thinking will change. You learn to "filter" your thoughts and words. It's simply counter-productive and unacceptable to act this way in the workplace with your peers and bosses... as well as with family and friends at home. You gain an appreciation for other peoples' struggles, which helps you to rethink the things to believe and say. Plus, you just learn not to say socially improper things.
My mother is a 4th grade teacher. When I was growing up, her favorite think to say to her talkative students was: "Everything you think does not need to come out of your mouth!" That was her advice for 9-10 yr. olds, but it applies to all ages.
You haven't had the opportunity to encounter a vast array of people in the real world. Your're still in high school, right? There's nothing wrong with being young. It's a nice age. You're young, fresh, untainted, hopeful, but naive.
Believe me, we all think at that age were very mature, because in comparison to your earlier years, you are. The next few years will change your attitude and maturity quite a bit, and it'll just keep on going. The 20's and early 30's are a big time for change.
So, next time you have a thought you're considering saying to another (or typing), maybe you outta take a time out and ask yourself why it needs to be said. Out of spite? Anger? Frustration? Putting other people down and hurting them? (it seems as though that's where your initial post came from)
Or are you helping and being kind? (This is an appropriate type of comment. All others are not.)
The majority of us are just here to vent and bounce ideas off of each other. It's not a board for naming calling or picking fights. That can be done elsewhere.
This board is for support of people who are struggling and reaching out to others.
I believe a sincere apology is in order for _______.
I mean an apology, not an in depth discussion about why you wrote what you wrote, or what else you suggest he do... This has no relation as to whether or not you agree with him. It's just being polite and humane.
In life, those with good character know when to swallow their pride and just say "I'm sorry I hurt you. I was wrong."
End of discussion.
_________________ "Go with the flow." -Communityflow.com
Thank you for sharing this. It's great advice that everyone should follow. I especially like the the last bit -- 'In life, those with good character know when to swallow their pride and just say "I'm sorry I hurt you. I was wrong."'
I recently learned to give apologies this way. Without defending myself, pointing out what the other person did or giving some reason for my behaviour. Just saying flat out, "I'm sorry, what I did was wrong." & you know what? The reaction I get from people is so much different. They're more willing to accept my apology & move on. & then I feel better about the situation. It's amazing how a few words can have so much power when used in the right way.
I've been noticing a bit of a problem (nothing that can't be fixed ) with disrespect on here. I'm sure all of you have heard this a thousand times before, but you aren't going to like everyone you ever meet. With that said, that does not give you the right to show them disrespect. Even if they are disrespectful towards you, be mature & keep showing them respect. Eventually they're going to look like total jerks if they keep up what they're doing. & we're on the internet, you can easily avoid these people, it's not like you go to school or live with them. Overall, I'd just like some people to start showing a little more compassion for others.
Anyways, I feel like I'm starting to ramble, but this is a topic that I feel is important so I figured I'd get my 2 cents in. & thank you again, Kris, for sharing this. I enjoyed reading it, it was very well-written.
In one of my classes last week, when we all walked in, we discovered there were whole chocolate bars on each of our desks. Surprise and delight was visible on each person's face as they filtered in. There audible laughs and other exclamations of happiness. Each person turned to the teacher with inquiring faces that asked her, "did you do this?" She merely shook her head and waited for everyone to get to class.
When class began she invited one young man up to the front of the class. He told us he was the one who had put the chocolate there. And he told us why, which sounded something like this: "How did you all feel when you saw the chocolate? Special. Happy. One of you said that it literally made your Friday. That chocolate cost me maybe 50 cents a bar, took 5 minutes to buy, and maybe just a minute before class to set out for everyone. And it made your Friday. Imagine what can happen when this kind of selflessness and kindness is passed around in even bigger ways. I mean, that's just chocolate, it's not even good for you. But it made such an impact on your whole day. Seriously imagine what the world can do with even more meaningful kindness and service."
That's the gist if what he said to us. It really stuck with me, and I think it has to do with what we're talking about here. Even in the forums, showing kindness, watching what you say, is important. If such little bits of kindness can impact someone's day, I'm sure little bits of rudeness, unkindness, and hatred, when built up, can ruin someone's life.
If such little bits of kindness can impact someone's day, I'm sure little bits of rudeness, unkindness, and hatred, when built up, can ruin someone's life.
I love that quote. I really do.
But yeah, there's really no point in being harsh. I've learnt this the long, bumpy hard way. Of course, there's times when I really can't help it, but sometimes you really just have to stop and think.
I tend to try and hold everything bad I think in my head, IN. Because alot of the time it is said out of anger or frustration. Sometimes, that isnt the case and I tend to speak my mind, when I shouldnt. Then it leads to hurt feelings or fights. But sometimes theres just not a right way to put things and no matter how hard I try to re-word something you terribly need to say, it still tends to come out wrong in my case. This being the case of real life.
Now as far as internet wise is concerned, when I was alot younger and someone decided to call me names, flame me, or just plain out be rude to me online, I would flat out start a online argument full of cussing and internet fighting. Until I matured enough to know that the person that I was fighting with, didnt know me from Adam, and could really care less who I was. They were doing this to make me angry, and I was letting them. They enjoyed seeing me fret and call them names, only to laugh in my face. They didnt know me, and I would probably never see them face to face. So now when I begin to have a problem with someone, or someone tries to start something with me, I simply ignore them, and just try to enjoy whatever I'm doing.
EDIT: This was my GOOD post. I'm sorry for the unrelated replies below. I deleted my posts so this thread would stay on topic.
No no, you'll catch on quickly I post a lot of jokes.. this one being how I was just saying how invincible to the law I am and then I start screaming how you've just set me up for a week imprisonment.. eh nevermind, I thought I was funny
![[Very Happy]](images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif "Very Happy"){kind=icon}
I think it can apply to many of us, give it a read:
![[Smile]](images/smiles/icon_smile.gif "Smile"){kind=icon}
) with disrespect on here. I'm sure all of you have heard this a thousand times before, but you aren't going to like everyone you ever meet. With that said, that does not give you the right to show them disrespect. Even if they are disrespectful towards you, be mature & keep showing them respect. Eventually they're going to look like total jerks if they keep up what they're doing. & we're on the internet, you can easily avoid these people, it's not like you go to school or live with them. Overall, I'd just like some people to start showing a little more compassion for others.
![[Razz]](images/smiles/icon_razz.gif "Razz"){kind=icon}
& thank you again, Kris, for sharing this. I enjoyed reading it, it was very well-written.
![[Sad]](images/smiles/icon_sad.gif "Sad"){kind=icon}
![[Tsk Tsk]](images/smiles/tssk.gif "Tsk Tsk")
Splitted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:48 pm by MissxMarieTM
